September 21, 2020
I was sitting on my couch last Friday night when I burst into tears after reading the notification of Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s death. She was a tireless advocate for women and a great human being. She was one of the few leaders in our government that I could sincerely look up to. It’s sobering to think about the huge gap her absence leaves in the midst of how polarized our country is and the upset many of us feel about those who are currently in positions of power.
This has been such a challenging year, collectively and personally. I know I am not alone in my defense of just shutting down as an attempt to cope with the magnitude of it all. So it was cathartic to cry, to feel and not avoid yet another loss and blow to what seems so fragile these days: hope.
As I started to gather myself together to head to bed, I registered with the table that I was looking at but not paying attention to. Snapping back into my body, I focused on the African violet directly in front of me. This little violet, Georgette, is the graft and daughter of another violet, Georgia. I’ve written about them both in the past. Georgia was a violet given to my ex by her Mom. When she and I broke up, Georgia was one of the many little, and big, losses of my life as it dramatically changed over six years ago.
However, Georgette is also a very tangible symbol of encouragement. She represents how life is still beautiful as it morphs and marches on in a direction that I may not want to follow, dragging me even if I refuse to cooperate at times.
If you haven’t read my prior post, I tried to graft a leaf of Georgia when I moved out. Although I was not successful, my ex was kind enough to help me out and grafted not one, but two violets for me. Not only are both offspring thriving, they are also flowering right now.
And that was what I was looking at. A little plant doing a mighty thing: living, flowering, adding beauty and wonder to anyone who is willing to notice. It’s a “re-run” of a prior oracle but it still has juice.
This is why I have to keep writing. Because it is how I flower, how I connect and express a life worth living, adding a little beauty and comfort to my life and by extension, hopefully to you the reader as well.
NN